April beginning at Artwalk April 6th.: A show of photos I took in Europe and Greece at: Obelisk Home at 214 W Phelps, Suite 101 Springfield, MO 65806 Springfield, MO 65806
June beginning at Artwalk June 1: A black and white show at: Randy Bacon Gallery at 600 W College St, Springfield, MO 65806
http://platform.twitter.com/widgets/hub.1324331373.html
As we get ready to start 2012 we need to take a broad look at the world, note what is happening and make some resolutions.
We look to the East and there we see North Korea, practically leaderless unless you call the playboy son of deceased Kim Jong II a leader. The potential is there for positive change with an uprising of the people or a take-over by the extremely strong military.
We look to Eastern Europe and find Russia in a state of chaos due to the people being fed up with a fraudulent government in power due to rigged elections.
We look at the Mid-East and we have the continual terrorist attacks in Iraq, the rise and protest of the Syrians and their government’s brutal crack-down, the deposing of Mubarak in Egypt and the subsequent turmoil in Egyptian election attempts, the Iranians and their conflicts with us and most of their neighbors, Israel and its’ adversarial relationship with Iran and the never-ending conflicts with the Palestinians, and the continued conflict in Afghanistan.
When I look back over the conflicts we meddled in from the Korean War forward I see a long trail of blood leading to a government that can’t seem to keep from being the world police. I suppose you could say that we at least beat back the North Koreans to a point that they only occupied half the country. Vietnam was a total farce in that we gained nothing except a lot of shed blood. Don’t forget that communism was the dirty word back then to die for. Now the dirty word is terrorist.
When you look at our way of governing of by and for the people it’s evolved for thousands of years through the Greeks, Western Europe, etc. Look at the growing pains and blood shed for these principles throughout history on our own shore and the shores of all our predecessors.
Yet we think we have to meddle in countries going through the same growing pains thinking we can force democracy on them and it will stay. We favor one side or the other and in twenty years fight the ones we helped. We forget that freedom has to be won internally if it is to mean anything. We are so arrogant to think that what’s good for us is good for everyone and frankly, I think it is not so good for us now unless we do some house-cleaning and fine tuning. It is a little like taking your adolescent child and trying to horse whip him into adulthood. We help a handful of protestors drop their leader , leaving a void when it happens that they don’t know how to fill. They often have not learned how to keep from fighting each other.
Back to whipping the son. While he is growing up we have our goals for him of being a doctor, lawyer or scientist because we think it will make us look good when he is satisfied running a lawn business. It does not mean he has failed, it only means he wants to do his thing.
We try to push a form of government on a people thousands of years in the making when all they may want is a benevolent dictator.
Much of the unrest I perceive in the world is a good thing. I think the smoldering logs of personal freedom have ignited into bonfires in many places and aren’t likely to go out. I believe this is true in our country. What scares me here is that police departments are gearing up with war equipment and police are aggressively trying to stamp out the Occupy Movement
So, my resolution this year for our country is: Do not get involved in the political growth process of other countries. Instead, let’s turn inwardly for a while and have some serious talks with ourselves on what we want. Let’s focus our money on taking care of our own people. Let’s move towards energy independence with technology that will lessen our dependancy on those countries that continue to threaten our security. After all, it is hard to be politically independent when, at the same time, we have to ask them for our oil allowance.
First, a photo of a gift. The luminous glow somewhat reflects some of my holiday feelings of family turning up and making themselves at home and my son’s neighbor friend coming over and enjoying the day with us. The political talk was less conflicting then usual but I am feeling sad about the planned backpack up Indian Creek that I am not coordinated enough to do. Backpacking never came easy for me. I only hope the troublesome foot and ankle issue can be resolved so that I can at least day hike. By the way, if I ever sound like I’m whining let me know. Two other positive anticipations for tomorrow……my middle son is coming plus the bonus of the grand-daughter. Tomorrow evening is Skyping with the grandson and his mom and dad while they open their box of goodies from my wife and I.
With four very close family members passing on in the last 5 years I found that the one I miss the most today is my brother-in-law who seems to have left an emptiness larger than my sister or either parent. In thinking about it, some people’s’ personality takes up more space than others. I think that this is partly the space in your mind and partly the flow of energy that is interrupted when they pass. The void is partly filled with your memories of them and the emotional exchange with them then becomes one-way. It is as if those emotions still reach out but are reflected back. And the emotions you traded with those people were never meant to come back. It is difficult to perceive these people in your life as being gone so perhaps their energy lingers as long as a reciprocal emotion keeps the exchange flowing.
I just finished reading in the Springfield News and Leader an article by Marta M. Helm about racial prejudices in the late 40′s. This story, along with comments I have heard from others reaffirms my belief that children are color blind when it comes to skin and we as a society, brainwash them.
I was born and lived for nine years in a society that racial issues were an unknown to me because there was no one there that you could say was racially different. I had no idea what my parents attitudes were on the subject until we moved to Springfield, MO. My parents were devout Church of Christ followers, in fact, my father was a minister, or maybe I should say evangelist. We still did not talk about it much. My mother had many prejudices and what I sensed was racial prejudice. but my father appeared to be color blind. This opinion was only what I sensed and observed. I did not grow up feeling much prejudice. There were a few slang type descriptions used like something being fixed and slapped together was “nigger rigged”. Actually, I’ve always been proud of myself when I am able to creatively solve a problem using what I have using no new parts or spending any money.
I went to school in Springfield being exposed to a variety of races, the predominate one being black. Grade school had a few blacks, junior high had more and high school was probably 20% or better black with a few Asians and Mid-Easterners sprinkled in. Springfield has drastically changed in my lifetime with the attraction to our medical centers of doctors being of all races, the general migration of Hispanics Asians and the return of some of the black population.
Springfield has had an ugly skeleton in its’ closet since 1906 when three blacks were lynched on the square after the disappearance of two women. The black population was roughly 10% of Springfield before the lynchings and 5% afterwards. The pre-lynching black population were a mix of doctors, attorneys, successful business owners, etc. What a cultural loss for this city!
I have a son, his wife and two nieces and their mates that are a part of the academic world or are well-educated. I shot candid photography at all of their weddings. The first niece to get married has a doctorate in neurobiology and her husband a doctorate in computer science. The wedding and party were melting post of all sorts of cultures and races. This is when I first really became aware that racial differences area non-issue to these people. I observed the people closely. A lot of the talk was above my head since they, like most of us, talk of work and career at such events. What I noticed is what I would call racial unconsciousness. I saw no behavior that indicated any awareness of racial differences. The common denominator being their intellect and the respect for each others academic accomplishments. This nieces’ husband was a native of New Zealand and Australia.
The second nieces’ marriage was more diverse in many ways. Her husband was a native Texan and Hispanic I believe. My observations at this wedding, held outdoors in the Texas hill country created an uplifting warmth in me because of all the love that seemed to eminate from everyone. The love between the niece and her adopted family was a thing to behold. I would have to say her husband is one of the warmest people I have ever met. In viewing my photos later, they truly represent what I observed at the wedding.
My son has a doctorate in cultural anthropology and his wife I believe, has a masters degree. Never-the-less they both teach at universities in Virginia. My son did his undergraduate work at Boston University, and his graduate work at the University of California-San Diego. He spent a couple of years in Germany doing research and speaks German fluently. He did a 1,000 mile bike trip alone through Western and parts of Eastern Europe. His wife is 25% Japanese but is fluent in Spanish. Their 2 year-old son, Kai is growing up trilingual. They met in New York City. I consider myself as being a social crusader of sorts when it comes to racism. I, however, do not have the racial un-awareness that my son and wife have. Their wedding and party in Richmond was again, one of many cultures, races, religions, etc. One of my son’s best friends is Korean. Their lives are intertwined with all cultures and races.
The prejudices I experienced growing up were more of a religious nature. My parents’ church felt they were the chosen denomination and everyone else was going to hell. I ended this affiliation at 13 and swore that none of my future family would experience this self-righteousness
So, why am I mulling over the above? It is because when I see these behaviors I feel that the human race, at least in part, has grown past those prejudices, but then again, maybe this microcosm of human life has always leaned in this direction. In the article one commenter chastised the writer for bring up the racial prejudice subject around this religious holiday. This statement itself, is prejudiced assuming that Christmas is a religious holiday to everyone.
In the election of 20008 I thought it incredible that the Democratic party had two viable minority candidates that I could vote for, not because they were minorities but that I had a good comfort level with both,and believed in the same values I did and that each had managed to get to this point in their lives. I am talking, of course about Hilary Clinton and Barak Obama. I for the first time, contributed to a political candidate and worked to help get him elected. I remember the emotionally charged party afterwards as people walked around stunned that we had pulled this thing off. I remember people like Jessee Jackson walking around with tears streaming down his face and those running down my face. I also remember my aged mother asking her eldest daughter in a worried tone “What are we going to do?”when she found out Barack was elected..
I still believe it was one of the greatest things this country ever did but It embarrasses me that Obama, in the most respected position in this country and maybe the world has to deal with racial epithets, slurs, and an extraordinary amount of death threats. Whether you like his politics or not, I believe one would have to say he has definitely been big enough for the job and has, in many ways, raised our position in the world.
In closing, Marta was criticized in the article for sharing a raw emotional experience in her life at such an importune time that undoubtedly changed and is still changing her life. Obviously written by someone who can conveniently shelve their emotions or frustrations and inequalities of our world. I ask what better time? If you are celebrating the holidays with their Christian significance, I believe that it symbolizes a time of new birth, a gift for the world, an implication of brotherly love.If you celebrate it as a time off work, a time for family and a renewal cycle of another year, I have to ask the same question. When I rejected my parents religion I was 13 and it catapulted me into a world where everything is shades of grey. I have been there since. I sometimes covet a person who sees in black and white although they are boring to talk to. Experiences like Marta’s, although still painful, remind us that our personal wounds may not heal completely but may be used as a tool to guide us into becoming better people. So if we are not able to live with black and white we will always be susceptible to new wounds. and uncertainties. You can either treat them as an albatross around your neck or you can dissect the negative feathers and positive feathers and add the positive to your wings of internal freedom.
The card that I submitted in the last post is a page out of my next book. I am ripe for the spiritual healing I prescribe in the poem. My soul is a combination of frustrations chafing me with raw gritty edges mixed with some sadness, exciting challenges and always new wonders springing from tangents of a mind never content with the mundane thought of the day..
I found a new friend this year. A soul brother who challenges my thinking, feeds me some of the fuel necessary to always explore new avenues and has the warmth to go along with it. He is a friend of 3-hour philosophical pancake breakfasts at McDonald’s. He is kooky and eccentric like me, and offers a smorgasboard of new words to add to my vocabulary. This is a rare thing to have and I very much appreciate it.
I started a new business with my son this year to help him find his way, setting off a chain of resentment and new loneliness and unworthiness for the middle son who has always felt left and coming in second or third.. It is frustrating knowing that all you can give is your love,when rejected leaving a cold dark void of emptiness in the middle of your being wondering if you will take it to the end with you. This is when an accepting friend, a new bright young grandson and a 30-year-old young son coming into his own are good void fillers.
The grandson is a step-grandson to my wife but you would never know. She has enveloped him into her maternal love and how that makes me even more attracted to her! She informed me yesterday morning that I had missed the opening over the telephone of the huge set of blocks I had sent and how, incredibly at 2 1/2 he exclaimed ” I build tower” and after knocking it down “I build tower again!” My consolation was that I was spending philosophical time with my business partner son who, for the first time in his life has been ignited by the emotions and frustrations of politics. And besides, there is the other box to share with Skype.
I have been thinking a lot about the phenomena of time lately and how it controls our thinking. Most of the time, we are either thinking about the past, it being a dim dream sometimes filled with regrets. We exist only in the “now” and if we control our destiny at all, that is the small niche in which we can change things. When I found I had Parkinson’s I decided that the course of my future lay in one obvious direction; to not thing about the tine of the future but to concentrate on now and what I wanted to immediately do. Frankly some of the happiest moments of my life have been in the last 3-4 years. I don’t care much what people’s opinions of me are which becomes obvious if you read any of my sarcasm on Facebook. However, I sometimes spend hours on the computer when that time needs a healthy dose of the outdoors mixed in it.
I spent all of the hours I could as a child outdoors. They were hours spent playing in the creek, building enchanting brush and grass huts, and smoking grapevines around a large fire. It was later in my young adult life that I learned to run away to nature. Nature is a good absorber of grief, depression and anger that so frequently visited my 20′s and early 30′s. It excudes calmness in the breezes, the purposeful activities of the many animals, the majesty of a huge pine, the trickle of water and the continual seemingly mindless perpetual re-creating and changing. It minimizes the importance of my problems for how could anything be more important than the progression of life?
So Christmas, for me will be filled, I am afraid, with the mornful sadness of not seeing my middle son and grand-daughter , but partly filled with the young son and his older neighbor that have created an incredible symbiotic friendship of trust and mutual caring. There will be the gnawimg pain of remembering the near-half of our family who have ceased and the joy of the adopted family members who ease the pain of the missing . There is comsulation in the words of Kahlil Gibran who said: “When you are joyous, look deep into your heart and you will find it is only that which has given you sorrow that is giving you joy. When you are sorrowful look again in your heart, and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight”.
I currently have a small exhibit of framed images from the book AUX ARCS Black & White Photography of The Ozarks Region at Lawrence Photo and Video at 2550 S. Campbell, Springfield, MO through the month of December
